I'm alive! I'm ok! I'm ok! Trust me :D

This is long over-due, past due actually. I will give you a summary: Graduated from bar tending school. Left my job (seriously I did no bs), applied to college. My financial aid hasn't gone through, home life even more hectic, love life let's not start (that is for a time when I'm not rushing :D). Any way, I'm going to focus on the here and now. With all the things that's been going on I remembered why I started this blog. I did this to let people get an insight on not just my life but theirs. We all go through things and I'm no different from the people around me, we're all human so we all make mistakes.

It brings me comfort to do this, I'm telling people whats going on in my life, and I'm being completely honest about it. When I stopped writing it wasn't because I was busy or any lie like that. I didn't want to have to tell the truth through my writing, there will be times like this later in life. I don't have the time nor the inclination to lie and say: "I've dealt with it" or "I've learned to accept myself and I've grown". To me all those are lies that I tell myself, every time the sun rises I realize who I am all over again and learn every ugly piece.

Hm, on a HAPPY note: I will be having lunch with my mother in 12hrs, she has been there for me with everything in her power. She may not be my mother by blood but she is in my heart and I am her daughter. Along with her twin girls (age 11) I love my "little sisters" they are everything I ever wanted in sisters! I don't see them like I see her but they ask about me and in return I ask about them :D. She is a big part of my life and she isn't going anywhere!!

Another HAPPY note: I am going on a job hunt and I will demolish everything in sight until I am an employee of  Insert job title and Company here:???. It doesn't really matter to me, I'm perfectly fine pushing mop water around as long as I get a pay check. The only thing I'm not ok with is not going to college, I can't think of my life going anywhere with out it...(nothing wrong w/people who don't go to college) I always dreamed of it as a get away of learning..(I'm a nerd).

Last HAPPY note: I have fallen in love into the gyaru world this will probably be the last time I talk about it here. I've been researching for a while, so I wouldn't look like a dumb ass, so yeah. That's all I've got sorry (hehehe)

Take care, Be safe, Want more for yourself!